Mirror of Erised 


I barely recognize the man in the mirror 

Who is he?where is he from ?

What’s his story?

I have an out of body experience with my existence

Like I’m a bystander, a passenger in another’s vehicle

My life is not my own,I have no control

I don’t have admin access,I’m a guest

So I enjoy the basics but miss out on the fundamental things

Looking at myself I’m like ‘hey stranger,

You look like you’re addicted to danger

You look like everything I wish I could be

Carefree,careless even,fun,on the run

On the run from me,yourself .

Or am I the one running?

Because everyday I find myself farther away from you 

The chasm cum canyon between us ever expanding

Like tectonic plates moving slowly but surely in opposite directions

But I can’t run,you can’t run either

I need you and you need me.

I am you ,you are me,

You and me are we,

We are us.

©P∆UL Z∆Y 2K17

Wanderlust 

She’s not the girl you always wanted,

The girl of your dreams

Her hips lie more than our politicians and the devil do

You suspect her forefathers probably practised voodoo

Maybe that’s why she can juju on that beat so well despite having two left feet

As far as fashion goes,she’s senseless,no fashion sense whatsoever

She doesn’t run so she can’t keep up with the current trends

But you can’t dare say she lacks style 

She laughs at what you call swag saying that you dress like a child

At the same time she says you look a little cute

But in a puppy kinda way 

And she likes puppies,which is a plus

She keeps you on your tippy toes

Frustrates you then makes you happy in equal measure

 She looks you right in the eyes when you talk and it scares you

Her eyes see right through your bullshit and charade 

And it throws you off your game

You’re not as good as you thought you were and she’s better 

She tells you her cornrows are tighter than your lines

She makes you think with your upstairs brain instead of the one downstairs

She won’t grind on you like every other girl cz she’s not every other girl

Even though her behind invites you to stand behind her

She won’t shake it either. She’ll shake her head in disappointment though

At your futile attempts to woo her

She’s not easy

Your money means nothing to her because she has her own

She’s a strong black woman who don’t need no man

So she sure as hell doesn’t need YOU

But she can want you

She already has you and she knows it

She’s got you trapped in her web like prey 

There may be plenty more fish in the sea but she’s a shark

She would be quite the catch 

She’s not the girl of your dreams but now you reason

 that you don’t really get that much sleep to dream anyways

She’s not the girl of your dreams but now you say dreams are overrated

Because even Martin Luther King Jr had a dream 

And he died before it came true

She’s not the girl of your dreams but unlike lupita ,not all dreams are valid

She’s not the girl of your dreams,she’s more.

She’s a day dream 

©P∆UL Z∆Y 2017

Bird set free

What is freedom?

What is freedom if I’m not free?

If I’m rooted to one place like a tree

Treated like a captive in my own country

What is freedom if I cannot speak

Speak Out against the injustices that have reached a new peak

What is freedom if I’m not safe at my sanctuary of worship

If the said place is not even considered under state protectorship

What is freedom if I’m not free to choose

If I have no control over anything like an addict of booze

If I feel like I have nothing to gain and everything to lose

And as I walk around I ooze 

Desperation and despair because the weight

On my shoulders won’t let me stand straight 

To my full height 

Because the powers that be look at me with fright 

That if they unchained me like django, I might

Come to my senses and realize that  I can fight

Back and actually win 

But they don’t want me to win

I know it is true because they won’t let me in

On the secrets to success even though they keep it within

My sight but out of my grasp

 like the proverbial carrot and stick and I gasp

For air as I try to catch my breath 

After another day of running after that carrot of death

I may be way out of my depth 

But I won’t beat around the bush like Tarzan

Instead I will stand up taller than

 Mohammed Ali, wake up early n tell myself ‘weh ni mkali

But unlike my brother graph  khali ,I will not graphically

Hold premature mazishis for my comrades in the game

And even though we dont deserve the blame,It is I who will hang my head in shame

If my daughter has to take D from her educators all in the name

Of not getting an E in her paper. I’d rather she gave zero F’s  about that exam.

Or if my son starts walking around with a gun to protect our fam

Because the streets are unsafe like unprotected sex 

And people are getting crazier than a jilted ex

It is time for a dissolution ,because I am no longer disillusioned

And I as the opposition have a proposition for the demolition of the devolution

Through collision with the coalition of crooks leading our society without sobriety

I am not sarafina so freedom is coming today not tomorrow 

Because I have reached the peak of my pain and sorrow

Im ready to wage war even if I’m solo

Wherever the road to freedom leads I will follow

Farewell as i journey along in this quest for a new era of peace

Because if I don’t do it myself,not even Swizz beats 

who married miss Alicia ,has the Keys, 

to set us free

And may we dwell in unity ,peace, and liberty🇰🇪🇰🇪🇰🇪

©Paul Zay 2017

Sundance 

You are special, you are amazing, 

You are probably the person Shakespeare keeps on praising

you are kind and one of a kind,

you are a rockstar because you rock not just the world but my world too

You are beautiful on the inside, on the outside you are beyond it

You are a happy little bunny full of  fun,very funny and sunny

Because you light up the world whenever you smile and I’d walk a Mile 

Or a 1000 miles to keep that smile on 

You are fresh like air con

You keep it popping and you ain’t corn 

One day when the wall between us is torn,

I hope to make your life full of laughter

Each day and every day after..

I want to write your life a new chapter

And it will go something like this:

From the moment they met,nothing was amiss 

She couldn’t recall being this carefree and full of bliss ,all she wanted was to be his

They were meant to be a couple, not a couple of friends 

So when he finally asked her out it was like an overdue process

He didn’t want to play games,clearly not into recess

He knew what he wanted and she loved that in a man ,

Saying yes to him was only the second best decision she ever made,

The first one being saying yes to Jesus Christ

Stealing her heart was nothing short of a miraculous heist

In him she found her solace,she was never alone

In him she found her place,finally she was home..

The rest of the chapter will remain unwritten because love is endless

And timeless and keep on going nonetheless
©paulzay 2017

#lovelivesmatter #heartfeltthoughts #writerslounge 

Fortunes Series 2 :Dear God

The universe has a broken sense of humor

I know this as a fact,not as just another rumor

Because though I had love on the brain like a tumor

She was the right person in the wrong time and place

I never even had time to state and plead my case

She was gone with the wind and I could not chase

Her. How could I? I had to pull myself together and try to brace

Myself to accept the fact that Maybe this wasn’t my race

I don’t believe in destiny but I believe in saying grace

So I did the best I could, I talked to the good lord up above

And said dear lord save her for me ,she’s the one

She’s what I need after all is said and done

I need you to Protect her from heartbreak and love gone sour

Or at least show her that I can be her strong tower

And as I think of her every second of every hour

I hope you keep her as beautiful as an exotic flower

And her smile as wide as the ocean

I pray she realises that for her I’ll swim across the ocean

Even though I can’t swim & I’d probably drown at the shore

Dear lord I hope she is part of what you’ve got in store

I hope you bring us together because no man can put asunder

Even though I know many will try to put us under

As you set things in motion for our paths to cross 

I am grateful in advance because you’re my source

Amen 

Copyright©Paul Zay 2017

Fortunes Series 2 :Dear God

The universe has a broken sense of humor

I know this as a fact,not as just another rumor

Because though I had love on the brain like a tumor

She was the right person in the wrong time and place

I never even had time to state and plead my case

She was gone with the wind and I could not chase

Her. How could I? I had to pull myself together and try to brace

Myself to accept the fact that Maybe this wasn’t my race

I don’t believe in destiny but I believe in saying grace

So I did the best I could, I talked to the good lord up above

And said dear lord save her for me ,she’s the one

She’s what I need after all is said and done

I need you to Protect her from heartbreak and love gone sour

Or at least show her that I can be her strong tower

And as I think of her every second of every hour

I hope you keep her as beautiful as an exotic flower

And her smile as wide as the ocean

I pray she realises that for her I’ll swim across the ocean

Even though I can’t swim & I’d probably drown at the shore

Dear lord I hope she is part of what you’ve got in store

I hope you bring us together because no man can put asunder

Even though I know many will try to put us under

As you set things in motion for our paths to cross 

I am grateful in advance because you’re my source

Amen 

Copyright©Paul Zay 2017

Self-destruct

I’ve been asked why I  write about love and its matters

Yet I am still a viable bachelor and that’s all that matters

If I’m the hero of my own story why can’t I get the girl?

My poems have ‘lines’ and all I have to do is aim and hurl

Them at my desired target and let the chips fall where they will

It may be harder than pushing a boulder up the hill

But I’ve been in love a dozen times over

And that always ends when the night is over

And my face is in my hands,more regret than shame

Wall of shame for me,for the girl only a walk of shame

Maybe to me it’s all the same,

Ping-pong, chess,love,it’s all a game

So I play peekaboo with her delicate feelings

Knowing she will hate me once she sees the beginnings

Of the end

She will become a lion that I can’t fend

Off 

So I scoff

this is not love,this is suicide

This is a poison killing me on the inside

And I’m not even Juliet, I’m Romeo

But then again like him I die by my own sword

Premature trip to go see my lord
Will God forgive me for all the hearts I’ve broken

will I forgive him for making me soft spoken

Sins of the past racing at me trying to catch up

The wrongs I’ve done are a tear I can’t patch up

They say God collects the tears of women and in that I’m a believer

I know I’m going to drown for the women I made cry me a river

The wrath I’ve attracted is doing push ups waiting for me

Self destruct,because it is I who brought it upon me

©Paul Zay 2017